Preparing this post (Is There a Book Inside Me?) prompted me to consider the current state of First Time Author jokes. A quick Google search revealed that while there are many jokes about authors and writing, there are no pages dedicated to jokes about first-time authors. I see this as a monumental wrong that needs to be righted[1]I did not intend this to be a political statement so if you choose, feel free to see this as a monumental wrong that needs to be lefted..
First-time authors labor in obscurity, and this is generally as it should be. Still, I hope that by offering a sample of first-time author jokes I can shine a light on at least one first-time author – me.
If you have a first-time author joke to add to this list, leave a reply below and include a website to give appropriate credit
[from the previous post]
How many First-Time Authors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Buy my book and you will find out.
Knock. Knock.
– Who’s there?
First Time Author. … First-Time Author … I said, “First-Time Author” … Don’t you want to know who I am?
Knock. Knock.
– Who’s there?
First-Time Author.
– First Time Author Who?
A First-Time Author with the wit of Douglas Adams, the magical appeal of J.K. Rowling, a touch of Stephen King’s suspense, the romance of Nora Roberts, and the popular appeal of James Patterson.
How many First-Time Authors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
While he was new to the publishing game, Jake had accumulated a lifetime of experience that made him the person best suited to screw in a light bulb. As a former SEAL, NYC detective, DEA undercover operative, and adjunct professor of Antiquities and Electrical Engineering, he had seen it all. He ran his lightly-scarred, well-muscled and sun-bronzed hand through the blonde hair he kept short while still allowing for a hint of curl at the ends…
Knock. Knock.
– Who’s there?
First Time Author.
– First Time Author Who?
Can I do a book signing, poetry reading, talk at your book club, wash your car?
[Your contribution here]
Footnotes
| ↑1 | I did not intend this to be a political statement so if you choose, feel free to see this as a monumental wrong that needs to be lefted. |
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